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Riddle Transfer 2/Dialogue
This is the dialogue for Riddle Transfer 2. Starting dialogue *"Completely useless." *Isn't that how my master worded it? *Oh, they'll see... *They'll all see how much worth I have. IN THE SEWERS... *on the portal **The portal still has to be powered up before it can take us anywhere. *on Smiley **Phi **Phil: Any ideas as to how we get out of this mess, Phred? **Phred: Maybe if we could just find a sleigh and some lemurs... **Phil: So... no. *on Zack **Zack: Thinking up an escape plan is hurting my head. **Phil: I'm pretty sure it's just the fire, Zack. **Zack: Man, sounds like we've got two hotheads in this room now. *on graffiti **Our lives are in danger here, you wanna admire poor spelling?! *on graffiti face **That graffiti seems to be having a more fun time than I am. *a wrong code in the monitor **Nope. *1337 in the monitor **Hey, this is no time to be looking for Easter eggs. *4003 in the monitor **It's a good thing that Zone 5.1's security kinda bites. *wrong portal target coordinates **I should probably pay closer attention to how these buttons work. *on the keycard slot **This looks like it needs a keycard. Do I have one of those? (Hint, hint.) *Power Room keycard on keycard slot **This is the second time in a row I've had a conveniently had a machine-powering doodad on hand. *on the keycard slot again **I've got the powah. ...turned on. In Riddle Elementary *Phil: So, who's ready to repeat an entire decade of school? *Smiley: I was reborn ready! *Phil: There goes my rhetorical question. *Cophey: Class, why have you been absent for the past several days? *Phil: We were abducted by aliens. *Zack: Then we got kidnapped by secret agents. *Smiley: We had to use a teleporter to get back to class. *Cophey: Yeah yeah, I've heard those before. So what really happened? *Zack: Why couldn't we have been in a more convincing-sounding double abduction? *Cophey: Well, I'm sure you have time to do your make-up work. *Cophey: I've decided that I'm not going to be having a quiz this week. *Quiz: Actually, I believe you are. *Quiz: I am Quiz, the new face of Vizion. *Phil: Oh, I remember, you were the one with the blue text in that one cutscene. *Quiz: Hey, Egghead! Thanks for rubbin' out my boss. Now I've inherited his throne. *Quiz: I am become Quiz, judge of all world-- and headmaster of this silly building! *Phil: I guess stopping cliché supervillains is my life now. *Quiz: I'd like to see you try that, Egghead. I won't be the push-over that Viz was. *Quiz: Ta-ta, worms. *Zack: Do we still have to do that make-up work, Mrs. Cophey? Ms. Cophey's class *on Phil **Come on, I'd never talk to myself! *on Smiley **Phil: How're you holding up, Smiley? **Smiley: I haven't found a reason to smile about this situation yet. **Phil: I'm glad we're both doing fantastic. *on Zack **Zack: I'd try burning my way out of this building, but that's too much property damage to pay for. *on Phred **Phil: Hey, Phred, is there anything around your desk that seems useful? **Phred: There's a green backpack on the floor here. I'm sure no one's using it. **Phil: I hereby confiscate this backpack, for science. *on Phred again **Phred: I think I've done all I can do to help, so now I'm just gonna blankly stare. *on Ms. Cophey **Phil: So, Ms. Cophey, what do think about all of this? **Cophey: I could really go for a cup of coffee. **Phil: Or six dozen, knowing you. *on trash can **It was tricky to reach, but scouring the trash can yielded a light tan paper bag. *on trash can again **Nothing else in there but trash. *on Ms. Cophey after standing up **Phil: So, Ms. Cophey, what do think about all of this? **Cophey: I could really go for a cup of coffee. **Cophey: We don't even have a coffee maker here. Drat, how else can you make coffee?! **Phil: I think I can conjure up a liquid that tastes like coffee. *on not Phil **It's less than flattering to know I closely resemble a paper bag. *on window **This school's windows can't be broken. Believe me, I've tried. *on "art" **I remember this picture and its outrageously oversized signature. **What kind of name is "JonBro", anyway? He should consider a name change. *on futuristic guns **Boy, Quiz and his minions made some fast modifications to the school. *bucket of water on Zack **Phil: Let me know if this is awkward. **Zack: Oh, don't worry. **Zack: It's DEFINITELY awkward. *on Ms. Cophey after drinking **I have no idea how Ms. Cophey's hand does that, but this room became a laceration hazard. Ms. Cophey hall section *on math book **It's a "exceedingly long division" book. **My opinion of this is very divided. *on clock **I'm fairly certain it's not 5AM or 5PM. **I guess it could be HAM, though. *bucket on water fountain **Bucket wet. Mr. Kahm hall section *on sign **I'm curious, does the "insane" on that sign refer to the students or the teachers? *on Vote 5 poster **That's an IDIDNTDRAW poster. The creator of this game must not have felt like drawing it. *on exit sign **No, sign. You exit. *on exit doors **Oddly enough, the doors are unlocked. **But I'm not leaving. Not this time. **I need to have a chat with our "new headmaster" who is probably in the principle's office. Mr. Kahm's class *on outlet **It's just an outlet. Not a creative outlet. *on crack **Looking at these cracks gets me nostalgic. And a bit disappointed they're still there. *on window **This room would have one hundred windows if it had 98 more windows. *on blackboard **It's amazing how all my teachers write in perfect Comic Sans. *on futuristic guns **"Hello class. Today's lesson is 'Don't get up, or you'll get shot.'" *on Richy **Phil: Richy! It feels like I haven't seen you in forever! **Richy: Uh... hi? Have we met? **Phil: You don't remember stopping me in the hallway before I showed you my hall pass? **Richy: Of course not! Who'd remember something as small as that? **Phil: In that case, let's start over. Hi, nice to meet you. My name is Phil Eggtree. **Richy: That's probably the dumbest name I've ever heard. **Phil: We're off to a good start. *on Richy again **Phil: Yo yo. **Richy: You're a yo-yo. **How's life? ...besides being unable to leave your desk without getting shot. ***Richy: My teachers didn't like me ditching my post as a hall monitor, so now I'm in a special class. ***Richy: I don't even have a smart teacher. I'm getting out of this school as soon as I can. ***Phil: Richy, you've got a lot to learn. **Do you collect buttons, perchance? ***Richy: What kind of dork collects buttons? And what kind of dork says "perchance"? ***Phil: Call it a hunch, but I'll bet you'll change your mind by the time we're in high school. **This school is under control of an alien bent on world domination. Any ideas? ***Richy: Well, I can't get out of here if there's an evil mastermind running the building, so... ***Phil: Eh, "mastermind" is giving him too much credit. ***Richy: Hm... All I've got is some Elmo's Glue. ***Phil: I'll take it! ***Richy: Woah, dude. I'm not just gonna give you the only thing I remembered to bring to school. ***Richy: One dollar. Then I'll trust you. ***Phil: Money: the root of all inconvenience. **This school is under control of an alien bent on world domination. Any ideas? (after giving dollar) ***Richy: I've got nothing else to hand over. Minus that dollar you gave me earlier. But I'm keeping that. **Bread crumbs and beaver spit. ***Richy: You're so random, man. **Goo'bye. ***Richy: Um, see ya. *dollar on Richy **Phil: I have a dollar that says I can stop this alien takeover, with your help. **Richy: Alright, I'll trade you my glue stick. Take care of it. **Phil: Don't worry, this glue stick and I will stick together like glue. **Richy: ...Please never say that ever again. Janitor's Closet *on bucket **Bucket get. *on mop **The end of a mop could almost be a pom-pom. A mop-mop? *on broom **Brooms really sweep me off my feet! Literally. It's quite painful, actually. Men's Bathroom *on vanity area **The sinks don't work, but at least they look nice. *on clean stall **That stall still seems to be untouched, even by alien hands. *on messy stall **I'm pretty sure there's not even a toilet in the stall. So, the inside of it is, uh, very messy. "Women's Bathroom" *I'm not looking forward to this. *But desperate times call for desperate measures. *...What the flozwad? *on gumball machine **It's... it's a gumball machine. **??!?! **The lid on this gumball machine is jammed shut. I wonder if I could grease it up a bit. *hand soap on gumball machine **The gumballs slipped out quite nicely with the lubricant. *on gumball machine when open **Sure, I'll take one. *on gumball machine once taken **I've never been in a women's bathroom before today.. **But I'm 99.9% sure this is not what most of them look like. *on light **Insert light-related pun here. Laser hall section *on poster **Not sure what I was thinking when I made this poster. There are more than 7 students here. **Well, maybe not when Quiz is in command of the building, but usually. *on sign **The sign reads: "Any human DNA detected passing through the red lasers will be shot." *on red lasers **Something tells me that the lasers aren't for printing. *on electrical box **With this wall of lasers in the way, I can't reach that electrical box. *on futuristic gun **I don't like the way that gun is looking at me, undressing me with its scope. *used chewing gum on electrical box **Gun, meet gum. *on electrical box after destroyed **That electrical box has seen better days--wait, never mind. It's only been around today. *on futuristic gun after disabled **With one look at de turret, I sought to deter it. Teacher's Lounge hall section *on fire hydrant **It looks convincing, but the fire hydrant is actually just made of foam. *gumball on Chubb **I think I should ask Chubb if he wants this first, instead of shoving it up his face. *on Chubb **Phil: Hey, Chubb? **Chubb: Hmmmm? **Phil: I like fat jokes, but I'm sorry for calling you a fatty. That was out of line. **Chubb: ...Oh. Yeah, you should be sorry for that one. **Chubb: It wasn't witty! You can come up with better material than that, Bald Eagle. **Phil: I like the way you think, Earthquake Generator. **Chubb: Haha, now THAT'S better! **So, anything new with you? ***Chubb: I don't mind being obese, except for the part where it's really unhealthy. ***Chubb: So I'm on the fence about whether I should stay like this or lose some weight. ***Phil: Just don't break the fence when you're sitting on it! ***Phil and Chubb: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ***Phil: No but seriously you'd probably be better if you lost a few pounds. **Could you maybe scooch over a bit? ***Chubb: I'd like to, but I can't move. I'm only here 'cause some aliens set me in front of the door. ***Chubb: Usually I can't get myself to move without a sugary energy boost, like a cookie. ***Phil: Oh yeah--I'm also sorry I misled you into thinking the cookie machine wasn't broken. ***Chubb: We all make mistakes. I don't have a use for this dollar, so you can have it back now. ***Phil: If I find any cookies lying around, I'll let you know. **Could you maybe scooch over a bit? (again) ***Chubb: Like I said, I think I need a sugary energy boost in order to move. **Did you see that the school was overtaken by a fat blue alien creature? ***Chubb: That clod! There's only room for one fat guy around here, and that's me. **Bread crumbs and beaver spit. ***Chubb: Sounds delicious. **See you 'round. ***Chubb: Ha, you see me very round! Cafeteria hall section *on exit doors **Huh, all the boards and barbed wire that used to be on those doors are taken off. **Now they're locked, like normal doors. *on exit sign **EXIT Cafeteria *on cookie machine **The cookie machine is still broken. Death will become us all. *on diagram **Useless blueprints are the most fun-filled blueprints for the whole family. *on blueberry Wet-Ade **Nice, the Wet-Ade stain hasn't been cleaned up. It was always my favorite. *on heck if I know **That stain looks like either liquid spinach, or vomited interior paint. *on infamous mustard smudge **I'm still not sure why I got in trouble for making fun of Smiley with this. **She actually found it funny, because it's barely qualifies as a smiley face. *on coffee grounds **I think I'll carry around these stray coffee grounds, because... why not? Teacher's Lounge *on left box **Someone must've put this box right down here, then up and left the room. *on desk box **It's a box being used as a desk. I wonder what's in it. Probably a desk. *on eye drops **Nit Wit: I see you eyeing my eye drops. Lay off, if ya know what's good for you. *on conveniently situated cloth **Yep, I'm pretty sure something is meant to be sitting here. *industrial eye dropper/hand soap on conveniently situated cloth when Nit Wit is looking **I can't keep anything there with an audience. *on hand soap **Nit Wit: I'm not sure why there's soap here, but you can take it. *coffee grounds on guard monster **Nit Wit: Don't waste yer coffee dust. I know when my eye's about to be attacked. *on guard monster **Phil: Hello. **Nit Wit: Howdy-do. **What's your name? ***Nit Wit: I'm, uh, Nit Wit. ***Nit Wit: My mom 'n pop thought it sounded intelligent. **I need to speak with your master. ***Nit Wit: He told me you didn't want you didn't want to speak with him, and I take his word over yours. ***Phil: Oh right. Yeah, that's fair. Of course. **May I have your eye drops? ***Nit Wit: Oi, it ain't easy havin' no eyelid. Eye drops keep me comfortable. ***Nit Wit: I mean, I can function just fine with a dry eye, but it gets irritatin'. **Does your eye feel dry right now? ***Nit Wit: Now that you mention it, I guess it wouldn't hurt to moisten it up. **Does your eye feel dry right now? (no container) ***Nit Wit: It'd better not be, 'cause somebody swiped my eye drops. **Does your eye feel dry right now? (hand soap) ***Nit Wit: Well, it does feel a little dry, but... ***Nit Wit: ...there's clearly a soap container where my eye drops used to be. **Hey, you're an idiot. ***Nit Wit: Pah! I'd pass every class at school on day one, and beat you at chess at the same time. **Hate to tell you, but you're in the way of the principle's office ***Nit Wit: 'Course I'm in the way, dummy. The headmaster's right through this door. ***Phil: You mean Quiz? ***Nit Wit: Obviously I mean Qui--uh... no. ***Phil: Then I guess I'll just have to sneak i--uh... look elsewhere. **Bread crumbs and beaver spit. ***Nit Wit: Is that an inside joke I'm unaware of? ***Phil: I gotta be honest, I'm not even sure. **Toodle-doo. *"exceedingly long division" book on guard monster **Phil: I bet you can't solve the math equations in this feeble earthling textbook. **Nit Wit: You think I'm dumb, do you? Oh, its on. *on guard monster while reading **Nit Wit: These problems are child's play. Want your book back? **Yes, your intellect is truly superior. ***Nit Wit: I'm ready for your silly human math any day of the week. **Nah, you're probably just bluffing. ***Nit Wit: Bah, I'll show you. *on conveniently situated cloth after guard monster left **No use for this spot anymore. Principle's Office Cutscenes *Quiz: How did you get in here?! *Phil: Through the door. *Quiz: Dude, I'm busy, like, dominating your entire stupid planet. *Phil: You call putting some turrets in an elementary school "dominating the planet"? *Quiz: This conversation is over. *Phil: If you're our new headmaster, it's about time you did something educational. *Phil: Quiz, I'd like to propose a quiz. *Quiz: A what? *Phil: I'll ask you some questions, and you don't have to answer them for me... *Phil: ...Just give me a few answers to choose from, and I'll take a guess which is right. *Quiz: Well, that seems fine. After all, you humans are all bad at multiple choice. *Quiz: You'll fail faster than your buddy Diz left you behind to die. *Phil: Hey, it's not my fault he has longer running legs than my friends and I do. Questions ---- *Phil: Question 1: *Phil: Vizion was a project dedicated to destroying every planet with an "evil" population. *Phil: Now tell me, after Viz's death, who was the first who was the first subordinate eligible to take his place? 1) Who was the first individual in Viz's line of succession? A. Diz *Quiz: Diz? If he was second in command, he'd be calling the shots! *Phil: Hm... We'll see about that. B. Quiz *Quiz: Well, of course I was Viz's first choice! I'm in charge now! *Phil: Hm... We'll see about that. C. Viz *Quiz: Bro, are you serious? I put that one on there as a joke. (redirect) D. Nit Wit *Quiz: Nit Wit's just our one-eyed bimbo who usually feeds Oswald, our weird pet who eats live meat. (redirect) ---- *Phil: Question 2: *Phil: What was Viz's opinion of you? 2) What was Viz's impression of Quiz (A.K.A. me)? A. Talented *Quiz: That's right! He called me the pinnacle of talent, in fact! *Phil: Oh, I'm sure. B. Cool *Quiz: Yeah, he thought I was hecka cool. Cool enough to use the word "hecka". *Phil: Oh, I'm sure. C. Nerdy *Quiz: I was always the nerdiest guy on the Vizion team. Except Nit Wit. He's a nerd. *Phil: Oh, I'm sure. D. Useless *Quiz: "Useless"? Whaddya mean, "useless"? *Phil: I heard it with my own invisible ears, Quiz. Back when I was just waking up from a long dream. *Phil: "Quiz, you're completely useless." *Quiz: Why, you-- ---- *Phil: Question 3: *Phil: How many of Viz's lackeys did he allow to use his data and technology regarding Vizion 3) How many minions tied to Vizion did Viz let access his data and technology for the project? A. Everyone *Quiz: Viz didn't keep any secrets! He let us all know how we can be the masters of the known universe! *Phil: Intriguing. B. A select few *Quiz: Oh, only the top dogs had any idea what Viz was doing. I knew, Diz knew, and that's about it. *Phil: Intriguing. C. Just one *Quiz: He didn't tell anyone but his second-in-command, pal. So, naturally, I know everything. *Phil: Intriguing. D. Nobody *Quiz: Nobody? Ha, he obviously told me, because I wouldn't be the new world conquerer otherwise! *Phil: Intriguing ---- *Phil: Question 4: *Phil: You said a minute ago, "You'll fail this quiz faster than your buddy Diz left you to die." *Phil: How could you have known about that? *Quiz: Can I skip this one? *Phil: Use your paper. 4) How did I, Quiz, know about Diz running off and leaving you and your friends for dead? A. He told me *Quiz: Yeah, duh! He told me when he, uh... *Phil: Very convincing response. Let's try that one again. (redirect) B. I saw it *Phil: Explain, Q. *Quiz: I, uh... ---- *Phil: And now for the final question. *Phil: Zone 5.1, the place where my friends and I were trapped... *Phil: Who owns that place? Who owns Zone 5.1? *Phil: I guess this quiz just became fill-in-the-blank. *Phil: Here's what I believe is the whole story. *Phil: The three leading figures of Vizion were Viz, Diz and You, Quiz. *Phil: Diz was second-in-command. You were third, because Diz considered you a "useless" underling. *Phil: As such, Viz shared only the nitty details of his plans with Diz. *Phil: So, when Viz was cut out of the picture... *Phil: In that moment, Diz was technically in charge of the fate of Vizion. *Phil: But if Diz decided to put an end to the project, you would never inherit powerful top spot. *Phil: You needed to eliminate Diz fast, but not without learning all of the project's secrets. *Phil: That's where Zone 5.1 comes in. *Phil: Zone 5.1 has a machine that can read minds and can translate it into data. *Phil: If you could get Diz into that machine, you could extract all the necessary data, and keep Diz at bay. *Phil: So you signalled Zone 5.1 with Diz's whereabouts and killed two birds with one stone. *Phil: This was an easy task, because Vizion owns Zone 5.1. *Phil: The place even uses Vizion's TV screens. *Phil: There must've been years of studies done before the project determined Earth to be evil. *Phil: Zone 5.1 isn't just a testing ground to research rare animals--it's a testing ground where Viz observed humans. *Phil: But one thing got in your way of your plan to steal Diz's newly inherited throne. *Phil: Me. *Phil: The machine never got all the data you needed to reign over the cosmos. *Phil: And now you're here... *Phil: ...hopelessly lost in your quest to be a true leader. *Quiz: It's true... I'm no leader. *Quiz: I even let you walk all over me with that whole quizzing idea. *Phil: There's still time to do what's right, Quiz. *Phil: Just let all my friends and this school, free. *Quiz: ...You're right. *Quiz: You humans can be smarter and wiser than I gave you credit for. *Quiz: All security measures are now offline. *Quiz: After I return to my home base, I'll put an end to all this Vizion nonsense myself. *Quiz: You've opened up my eyes. It is up to the civilizations of the universe to judge themselves. *Quiz: Thank you, Egghead-- *Quiz: Sorry, Eggtree. Phil Eggtree. *Phil: Stay classy, Quiz. *Phil: Go and make peace, like a true leader. *Smiley: Could that be...? *Phil: Oh no.. *Diz: Joys of joys, this doomsday device can use ice from comets as fuel! *Diz: Finally, nothing is in my way--not Viz, not Quiz, not those meddling kids... *Diz: Now Vizion is my vision. *Diz: No more beating around the bush with that "judge the planets" garbage... *Diz: Just pure, cathartic destruction of all civilizations in sight! *Phil: Diz is up there. It must be him. *Phil: Take me up there in your ship, Quiz. *Phil: I'll do what I have to do to stop him. *Quiz: Does this mean... you have a plan? *Phil: No... I've got nothing. *Phil: But we have no choice but to try! *Quiz: You're right! I'll take you closer to the light! *Phil: But before I go... *Phil: Smiley? *Phil: I used to tease you a lot, because I didn't understand you. *Phil: But now, I realize you're a true role model for me. *Phil: And... you have a beautiful smile. Space Front of the shuttle *Quiz: I've never used this shuttle for combat before, so... *Quiz: It's up to you to find something we can use to fight that ship! *on charging ice beam **That laser is targeted to freeze earth. **Blocking the shot would be a temporary, and fatal, solution. *on Quiz **Quiz: I've never used most of the equipment in this shuttle... **Quiz: I'd help to figure it out, but I need to keep this shuttle as stable as I can. **Quiz: I'm sorry... Front panel *on keyhole **I'm not getting whatever's in the panel unless I find a key, I guess. *key on keyhole without finishing puzzles **Nothing happened. I don't think I'm quite ready yet. *key on keyhole **Phil: What? Is that it? **Phil: I would've thought you had some ammunition in this fancy spacecraft. **'Phil': Isn't there anything else? **'Quiz': Take the escape pod. **'Phil': But-- **'Quiz': There's only room for one of us in that escape pod, Phil. **'Quiz': The clock is ticking. **'Quiz': I will finish this. **'Quiz': Go and be with your friends on Earth. Dialpad panel *wrong code **Nope. Combining *industrial eye dropper and hand soap without opening **If I'm gonna put anything in this eye drops thing, I'll need to find a way to open it. *sawed-open eye dropper and hand soap **Now I need to find a way stick the two parts of this container back together. Category:Dialogue Category:Riddle Transfer 2